2005-03-15 - 11:03 p.m.

I went on a student radio station on Sunday.

I listened back to the show today and was struck by how astonishingly boring I sound.

Really. You can hear the show here by clicking on the link marked RareFM.2005.3.13.21.0.7

You may suspect I'm dissembling and fishing for compliments. I'm not. Anyone who says anything nice about my voice on the basis of that show has clearly not listened to that show, as had they listened to the show they would be unable to pay me any compliments on the basis that they would be in a coma due to terminal boredom.

It's a good job the station is only available on the internet, as had any drivers accidentally tuned into Rare FM at about 9.30 on Sunday they would have instantly veered off the road. My voice is the equivalent of the gas which the plane in Goldfinger sprays around Fort Knox. MI5 are thinking of deploying me in hostage situations, reading something out. If I talked in my sleep, I might never wake up.

If you are foolish enough to listen, bear in mind that it's an amateur venture (in the nicest possible sense of the word). Hence the feedback, voices being too quiet, too loud, jumping cds, accidentally restarted cds and of course incredibly dull guest doing a ham-jawed job of promoting his 60's night. The host is a good sort, though.

The worrying thing is that I recently signed up with a voiceover agency. I'm sure any big-spending client who happens to have heard that show is going to be chomping at the bit to sign me up for their campaign. "We need the monotone guy! Get me the monotone g-zzzzz".

Perhaps I can land the Nytol gig.

Profilage - Previosity - Nextitude